Poetry is the synthesis of hyacinths and biscuits.

Carl Sandburg



St Nick sent me a message decrying the unjust comparative esteem in which Malted Milk biscuits are held. The only way I could fathom to remedy such a heinous misperception was to review a bunch of cookies and record the experience for everyone. I believe this podcast is a definitive piece which sets the true worth of the Malted Milk against a global background of baked delights.

Now if you haven’t picked up on my sarcasm by now, I have failed as a writer. In truth, the LPC has taken a lot out of us as people as well as academics. It is a blessed relief to be able to sit down on a Tuesday afternoon and eat biscuits with our friends. Below, for our delectation and your fascination, are pictures of the cookies we consumed. I’ve ordered them chronologically for a seamless conflation of viewing; tasting and listening experiences.

Firstly, as a control, we feasted on the malted milk.

Next we devoured some custard creams:

From Far Turkey (we think) came the next biscuit, the Ülker Biskrem

Lithuania was our next stop, with the Adugs chocolate and caramel biscuits

Thoroughly full from these, we drank some delicious coffee and ate some Amaretti

Next we journeyed to Poland to try Wykwinte Elegant biscuits

After this we tried honey cakes with poppy seeds

Penultimately we wrapped our mandibles around the Choco Leibniz

And finally, the moment for which we have all been waiting: Omas Nüsse, which are pictured in the featured image.

Thank you all for listening, I hope you enjoyed this podcast as much as we did. We shall see you very soon for the next one…