I have been attending Church on a daily basis recently, and not because Lent has encouraged me to take my religious profession more seriously. You see the Church is a pub, and a rather good one too. At its altars one tends to drink of beer not wine, unless one is an outrageous degenerate in which case one imbibes Cider.
Let’s begin with the beer, the essential element of any pub. There are several; I have opted every time for a pint of the Tighthead. A real ale, of course, with a rather rich flavour. As I haven’t tried any of the other beers, I cannot say whether they hold up to scrutiny as well, but I suspect as much. Cedric no doubt will chalk this up to my lack of adventurous spirit, but as he has ordered a pint of Aspall’s cider every time, I feel on this occasion he has no foot to stand on.
Of course, I realise, dear readers, that I may have made a blunder. You see without realising it, I have in the space of two paragraphs twice insulted cider drinkers. Rest assured I do not wish to unduly censure those bibulous connoisseurs, like my father, who indulge occasionally in a pint of cider alongside a healthy diet of bitters and other more traditionally correct drinks. I tolerate such acts of folly with a wry smile and occasionally offer a gentle witticism along the lines of: “so when did you become a farm labourer”. No, my opprobrium, rest assured, is levelled solely at those infantile entities who refuse ever to graduate from drinking alcoholic apple-juice, to try a nice pint of real ale.
Anyway, back to the review. We have on occasion been known to order some food at the Church. The first time we went for the pizza. I cannot confess to be an authority on pizza à la Cedric, but I do know a good one when I see it, or rather eat it. It was perhaps not pizzeria standard, but it was a very worthy pizza pie (as the colonials would say), and homemade too. On other visits, we have ordered chips and halloumi fries. I have no idea what halloumi is. It seems to be something vegetarians go in for, but don’t let that put you off. These particular fries are exceptional, they were really meant for Cedric, but I must say I took a fair few for myself in a most dishonourable manner.
Overall the Church, is an exceptional establishment. The staff are warm and friendly and the whole place has a traditional feel with a modern twist (to coin a pretentious phrase). It looks like a pub, sounds like a pub (without the modern trend for loud annoying music), and on closer inspection is a pub. A very good pub that is.